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~xxTekkenBabexx

Jaz
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Devious Journal Entry

Sat May 3, 2008, 10:22 AM
  • Mood: Promiscuous
  • Listening to: Flathead - The Fratellis
  • Reading: Spanish dictionary
I haven't updated in ages, I know. I'm bad. I've just been really busy. It's a pathetic excuse, but it's true. Too much pressure from school and all that crap. Things aren't exactly going perfectly for me. Me and him...well, nothing's ever going to happen. I'm officially moving on. It doesn't feel to bad, to be honest. I spent Sunday night crying about him, but I'm coping well (better than I thought). I'm actually enjoying myself a lot more. I feel liberated because I don't feel guilty when I'm with other guys anymore. It's a nice feeling.

I've been doing a lot of research into random things lately. I've been looking at universities, although I still have a few years before I have to even think about applying. I just like to plan ahead. I've been writing and reading quite a lot. I've realised that it's the small things in life that I take for granted and I'm trying not to. So I'm spending more time just listening to music, reading, enjoying the sun/rain and stuff like that. Going back to basics.

I'm going to start reading, but I don't know what. I don't want to read fiction (and definitely not fanfiction). I want to read something challenging that questions reality. Something intellectual. Any suggestions?

My taste in music has expanded, too. I'm currently in love with The Fratellis. I've always known about them, but I got their album yesterday and I love it.

I have to say, life is taking it's toll on me...but somehow I'm enjoying it. Like I said earlier, it's all the small things. Maybe I'm just speaking complete bullshit because it was sunny on Friday and the prospect of summer is doing things to my mind. Summer always makes me optimistic and happy.

Here's hoping I can have a summer romance, eh?

31 Comments

Devious Comments

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:iconjazzexxx:
*jazzexxx May 3, 2008, 10:36:15 AM
-pulls out big guns- ima blow his arse up....
i'm so sorry about that hun :hug:
blah, what happened...?
my poor jazzy. :(
well i'm here if u need to talk

--
&& while everyone else was a fruit i was the rice ball
:iconxxtekkenbabexx:
~xxTekkenBabexx May 3, 2008, 11:55:08 AM
I just got pissed off with having to wait for him. I mean, I used to feel guilty even flirting with another guy. So I asked him if it was ever going to happen, and he said no. But the strange thing? We're still friends. It's as if nothing happened. I mean, it's really sweet because he's still being lovely. I love how I can be brutally open and honest with him without any consequences. And that's enough for me. If we weren't still friends, it would hurt so much. But nothing's changed, so I'm loving it.

And don't blow his ass up. He really doesn't deserve it. If anything, he deserves a 'thanks' for being unconditionally lovely.

--
"No, if you talk to God you're religious. If God talks to you, you're psychotic." - House
:iconsmilie-terrorist:
~smilie-terrorist May 3, 2008, 11:57:29 AM
OH NOES WE'RE BOTH LISTENING TO ENGLISH MUSIC O: Although I do prefer Muse (obviously my current uber-obsession... hey, they had like 5 albums which I hadn't listened to ^^) to The Fratellis, they are still good. I downloaded their album years ago, but I only liked 2 tracks from it so I deleted the rest lol. XD

Don't worry about it. There are always better people. :-)

Intellectual reading? My personal choice would be something Physicsy to do with the String Theory or something. But for you, I suggest the Philosophy section in the library. ^^

When I think of summer, I think, 'oh gosh, more work. D:'

--
きっとあなたはそう、私と同じ...

Thanks to Buyochan for my icon!

♥ Cute charms for sale!! ♥
:icontechnologicallyinept:
~technologicallyinept May 3, 2008, 10:34:20 PM
Well that kind of sucks :glomp: But at least you're free to enjoy the time with the other lovely creatures :giggle:

Wow, you are thinking ahead. Even last year I wasn't really looking into universities overly much... the place I'm currently studying at I didn't even know about and my dad just made me apply for it :laughing:

Intellectual reading? I can't think of anything which is overly nonfiction... personally at the moment I'm just stuck reading physiology books :cries:

--
,-._.-.
V)"(V
(_♥_)

Woof
:iconxxtekkenbabexx:
~xxTekkenBabexx May 4, 2008, 4:00:34 AM
I KNOW. WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO?! You should see my Last.fm account -- it's been overtaken with English music. Even my beloved Dima Bilan is going to lose his weekly spot at number one. What is wrong with us?!
I'm not really into Muse. I like more of the Indie stuff, hence The Fratellis.

I know :) I'm already moving really swiftly...

I really liked that lecture (but, during that lesson, Farrow covered the lesson I was supposed to be in :(). I thought it was really interesting, especially when Handa explained it in more depth to me afterwards. I will take your advice, however.

That's a shame :( I love the summer!!

--
"No, if you talk to God you're religious. If God talks to you, you're psychotic." - House
:iconxxtekkenbabexx:
~xxTekkenBabexx May 4, 2008, 4:03:50 AM
:hug:
I'm actually fine now, thankfully. I didn't want to spend time being depressed, especially since I have exams to sit soon.

I just want to have a solid plan. I'm one of those people that just has to know what they're doing.

--
"No, if you talk to God you're religious. If God talks to you, you're psychotic." - House
:iconjazzexxx:
*jazzexxx May 4, 2008, 7:27:48 AM
aw i never get to blow people up -pout pout- lol
ok, well as long as he stays nice and sweet it's fine.
oooo jazzy's flirting?? do tell :D

--
&& while everyone else was a fruit i was the rice ball
:iconsmilie-terrorist:
~smilie-terrorist May 4, 2008, 8:16:57 AM
I have a Last.fm account somewhere... I rarely use it though.
I used to listen to one or two English songs a week, more if I really liked the song. But it's strange that I haven't even listened to a foreign song more than once in these few weeks! O:
I'm not sure what I'm into. I'm not really into a certain genre or style; if I like a song, I like it! And if I hate a song from the same genre, then so be it. (That doesn't really work with most songs I hate - I automatically dislike anything to do with rap/r'n'b/hip-hop etc. It just doesn't agree with me.)

That's good to hear ^^

Farrow covered your lesson? But wasn't your whole year supposed to be there... oh wait, it was only the top maths sets, wasn't it? ^^
If you do find that kind of stuff interesting, it's covered in some of the New Scientist magazines in the library. Check those out too if you like.

I love the summer too - but school HAS to spoil it D: Hopefully I can do some interesting stuff in my holiday. I'm not making another costume so I'll have some time to do stuff lol XD but I may need to get a part time job... Problem is, I'm not really motivated in a workplace unless the work is interesting. That rules out every single high-street shop. I wouldn't mind working in Hobbycraft, I suppose... XD

--
きっとあなたはそう、私と同じ...

Thanks to Buyochan for my icon!

♥ Cute charms for sale!! ♥
:iconxxtekkenbabexx:
~xxTekkenBabexx May 10, 2008, 11:15:47 AM
He is being really sweet. I want to go out with his friend (I know it sounds bitchy, but I've been crushing on him for a long time too), but he's basically told me that he doesn't think he's suitable for me. Everyone says he's just doing that out of jealousy, but I just don't know what to think anymore.

--
"No, if you talk to God you're religious. If God talks to you, you're psychotic." - House
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